Do your Good Enough

Sometimes you want him to do his GOOD ENOUGH, and not his best

Really, K? This was your pearl of wisdom for the week? In my field of expertise, behavioral pediatrics, often I treat families coping with major and minor behavioral challenges. And many of the parents seeking my services having many needs. Setting priorities to focus interventions, both physical and behavioral, is key.

When I was young, my parents didn’t push “getting straight A’s.” For some odd reason, they and I gulped down the philosophy…JUST DO YOUR BEST, which, in reality meant SO MUCH MORE than the Straight A Gold Standard. Somehow the Do-Your-Best translated into a foundation of perfectionism that served me well. I must say, I tend to be a thriver.  Do your best? I am a BEST friend. The dudes at the post office know my BF’s by name because I send out a few care packages a week. Do your best? I am a BEST blogger, offering variety on a goal of 2 posts a week, and I reciprocate by hopefully making insightful comments and contributions. Do your best? I am a BEST Colleague. I offer free healthy parenting lunches in the cafeteria once a month and volunteer at the library. Do your best? I am a BEST TRAVELER, making the most of my time abroad my venturing out at least twice monthly (in the past year, I’ve been to 10 countries in the past year)

But DOING your BEST isn’t always the best.

When I tell myself “do your best” it sometimes translates into pushing myself to make a homemade dinner, spending 20 minutes chopping vegetables, when I have a frozen one all ready to go or I could have picked up a healthy option. It sometimes boils down to a be-grudged gym visitation when my body says sleep in. It sometimes is reduced to calling a “friend” for the 4th time to arrange another coffee date when she hasn’t emailed me or called me in ages.

TRUTH: WHEN I DON’T DO MY BEST, I OFTEN FEEL LIKE A FAILURE.

When kids, adults, all of us equate doing anything LESS THAN YOUR BEST with FAILURE….it creates FEAR of being ENOUGH and insecurity. Why can’t we teach each other to FOCUS on 1 challenge or hard task at a time, and letting the rest be “good enough?”

In fact, this is what a personal trainer will tell you, or a dietician…or, if she is “good”, your doctor (Go, K!). Because if you “did your best” and worked all muscles at the same time, the quality of progression would decrease, and growth would be impeded.

I have to say SO WHAT??? a lot of the time to focus myself, and my patients.

So what if my postings aren’t as frequent as I say they “should be”?

So what if I eat from the cafeteria salad bar tonight?

So what if I only make it to work after sleeping 6 hours and that is my major accomplishment of the day?

For me, I don’t need to read The Little Engine that Could…and I am guessing, NEITHER DO YOU!

What’s your GOOD ENOUGH today? Join my battle against perfectionism and share this post!

 

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5 thoughts on “Do your Good Enough

  1. I didn’t know you were in behavioral pediatrics. That sounds so interesting. I work with kids right now as well.

    I agree with you about trying to focus on one task. We often try to be good at so many things at once and that is the best way for us to get discouraged.

  2. i am taking three classes this semester. two of them are great and the third i do not like so much. i have decided that i am not going to worry about getting an A in the one i dont like. i’d focus my energies on the things i am liking. so that is my “good enough!”

  3. I have parents who told me that straight-A’s are the only way! So I put myself under a ton of pressure to succeed, not just to my best. And I am pretty sure I am putting the same pressure on my daughter. It is a vicious cycle!!

    My good enough today is that even though I didn’t get through my Toastmaster’s speech this morning with flying colors, I got up and I did it. And that is good enough.

  4. I never thought about it that way, like a failure if you don’t do your good enough. I always think if I try and that really was all I could do, than that was my best, and if I did not try, then I did know that was not my best and although a failure, one that was anticipated due to the lack of effort on my part. I know when I am not trying and I know what the consequences will be. I am of course a perfectionist, which is a problem, but when I do try, I give it my all and I am usually determined to get it done to the best of my ability. As long as I know that I did my best, I am content, even if it is not considered the best by someone else’s standards. I never want to compare myself to anyone else, only go but my own standards.

  5. Oh such a Catch 22! It’s almost bad for parents to tell their kids, “you must get straight A’s” but then at the same time, “do your best” isn’t much better or less intimidating! How do we know what our BEST is?? I mean, our best is probably a standard that is often time not possible to reach..so….are we failures?!

    Great post. Today I will do my best to read some blogs and write some comments, but I’ll also be honest with myself and quit when I need to go to work….meaning, I won’t read many, and I’m OK WITH THAT!

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