If you’d like some goodies, check out this giveaway Special K Challenge. In this economic and time pressure cooker, think creatively. Perhaps you can share some of your creativity and make something (homemade scone mix, offer of designing a new blog layout) or send a book that you have loved and cherished, or purchase a gift card (Canada bloggers, I’ll send these your way!) Oh gosh, and let me share a great giveaway option to score some DIVINE handmade accessories here!
Now, here are thoughts on comparison compulsion, inspired by someone complaining about how much weight she put on after turning 50, and then complaining about Demi Moore. And then me saying “really? Is this what us doctors are going to spend our energy on today?” Enter in mistake #1, #2, and #3.
Mistakes I make every day include either 1) comparing myself to myself, or some perfect version of myself that I think I “should be 2) comparing myself to others 3) criticizing others who do 1 and 2. Some days, I make all three.
#1: I want to out do myself. Every day. I want to run faster, longer, better and log more minutes/miles this week than last. I couldn’t stop at master’s, had to “go on” I have to “be the best I can be.” Nothing wrong with a little motivation, but honestly, the natural progress of living does not always lend itself to what we socially define as “better.” We despise any signs of regression or weakness: wrinkles emerging, bellys sagging, boyfriends leaving, a 3.6 GPA over 4.0, doing less or being less noticed brings dissatisfaction. And yet: THERE”S WHERE LIFE IS! I need to challenge myself that more is better. We have skewed expectations if we despise signs of life: If your hips or belly are pooching because of age or having children, you have experienced. Stop comparing yourself to what you are not, or have been, or what you “could/should be” and honor what is abundantly present right now.
#2: This person is happier than me. What assumptions do you make about the lives of others? Sometimes in the blogosphere, we assume that the meals, products, routines of others may cultivate fulfillment. We may compare our blogs (how many comments/followers) or our eats or practices with others. I frequently do this with myself (last week I had 20 comments!) and others (she has 40!). Why? Why measure and weigh my worth as a writer on these comparisons, with random definitions of “goodness” (40 is better than 20). This woman today always smiles at me first thing in the morning…and Demi Moore doesn’t. She matters more to me. Does that make sense?
#3…I think comparisons may be a natural phenomenon, but the intensity at which they are currently occuring is NOT natural OR HEALTHY. So I think if I am going to fudge something up today, here is where I’ll aim to crash.